Kevin Rudd is now a Barbie girl. Please look away

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Kevin Rudd is now a Barbie girl. Please look away

By Amelia McGuire and Charlotte Grieve

It seems social media interns all over the country are racing each other to kill Barbie.

The film hasn’t even been in cinemas for a week but it’s already over thanks to the deluge of eye-watering posts, including one from US ambassador Kevin Rudd (“he’s just Kevin”) and another now-deleted clanger from NSW Police (“this Barbie is serving the community”).

The Australian Energy Market Commission chair Ann Collyer also weighed in with an eco-warrior Barbie take headlined “You can be anything – Barbie’s power quest”.

Victorian Senator Jana Stewart spotted an opportunity, mocking up an Aged Care Barbie who is getting a pay rise thanks to Albo. The Greens had a slightly more sinister take, posting a photo of Barbie’s melted face to repeat the party line for an end to gas and coal.

Credit: Jozsef Benke

There’s also been plenty of taxpayer-funded Mattel promotion. The nation’s statisticians tallied the stats of professions from Barbie versus Oppenheimer. The Therapeutic Goods Administration used a photo of three Barbies to remind “consumers to steer clear of products containing ‘melanotan’.”

It seems heritage-listed status is not enough to protect you from the pink storm. The Sydney Harbour Bridge became tainted over the weekend, with NSW Premier Chris Minns proclaiming “this Barbie is a Sydney icon we’d never sell off”.

Notably absent from the discussion was Julie Bishop, who was given her own Barbie in 2021 as part of Mattel’s trailblazer series. Where you might expect a dash of pink, Bishop’s latest socials are all runs and speeches.

This column enjoyed the movie as much as everyone else, but it’s time to stop the bedazzled conga line of relentless cringe.

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It has gotten so out of hand, you’d be forgiven if the video of conservative pundit Ben Shapiro torching a bin full of Barbies sparked a little bit of joy. This Barbie has had enough.

BROKE SURGEONS

The finances of Australia’s surgical class are on life support, and without emergency intervention, the industry body could soon go under.

That’s the diagnosis from Royal Australasian College of Surgeon’s president Kerin Fielding and vice-president Owen Ung who sent a mea culpa to members this month.

The college’s costs are rocketing, and income from training fees has not kept pace, meaning drastic change is needed to “ensure the ongoing solvency of the college”.

The college has reported two successive deficits of more than $10 million, and its assets are tied up in property – triggering a “careful investigation” to refill the coffers.

“Essentially the college has been living beyond its means, not through extravagance, but through not retrieving the true costs of education and training,” the letter said.

“We apologise for any missteps in operational management and oversight that have led us to this point.”

They’re now calling in the reinforcements, appointing Barwon Health director Shane Solomon, KPMG partner Souella Cumming, Australian Institute of Company Directors lecturer Nic Carr, ASX-listed director John Craven to a “recovery committee”.

The team will host a webinar for members in August, with surgeons privately worried about fee hikes.

Let’s hope this recovery is without complications.

NO MORE NEWS

Journalists were perplexed to arrive at The Australian’s Sydney newsroom last week to find red signs plastered to the walls outlining changes to the hard copy newspaper selection.

“Effective immediately, the mailroom will no longer be supplying The Sydney Morning Herald and the Financial Review for general distribution.

“Should you wish to receive a copy of either/both, please submit an email request with your manager’s approval and we will happily organise a subscription for you. We apologise for any inconvenience.”

Word among staff is they’ll be asked to pay for their own access to our papers and only the “chosen ones” will get access for free, one source said.

Is it cost-cutting? Axing the competition? Another sign of the death of the office? Hard to tell.

POOL-BARRELLING

Victoria’s hosting of the Commonwealth Games was going to make a splash in the state’s regional towns, which were promised federal investment in high-end sports infrastructure.

The keen flippers of Armstrong Creek and neighbouring communities were set to be left with a 25-metre pool after 2026 when the Games concluded.

But locals say there are already plenty of places to cool off in the region, with the $30 million 50-metre Leisurelink Pool at Waurn Ponds, and three other aquatic centres (planned or built) in the region – Torquay, Norlane and Drysdale.

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You could be forgiven for wondering, why the need for more?

Perhaps it could have something to do with Armstrong Creek’s location in the electorate of South Barwon, a seat held by Labor’s Darren Cheeseman on a margin of just 3 per cent – a seat the Liberal Party had to win if the Coalition hoped to return to power.

Meanwhile, North Sydney’s $89 million refurbishment continues to strive for the gold medal in the world’s slowest (and most over-budget) development. It’s now slated to reopen in April next year.

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